Tuesday, July 12, 2011

chelsea handler and andre balazs

images Chelsea Handler Denies Making chelsea handler and andre balazs. Comedian Chelsea Handler won#39;t
  • Comedian Chelsea Handler won#39;t



  • mps
    08-05 02:35 PM
    Agree. Like labor subsitution scandal/abuse, you should have a documenterly evidence to go after this scam (creating duplicate EB2 job just to cut-short the line). If it is a USCIS rule, they may ripoff this ( like labor sub.). It is long way to go. The nut shell-- as long us GC is in high demand, people abuse the system. DOL, USCIS, knows this. Thatswhy DOL is auditing most EB2 labor certification. In my view, who ever filed EB2 between 2000 to 2004 (when EB3 was current) are true-EB2. After 2005, most of the EB2 filings are cut-short the EB3 que. Most of the cases not based on actual MINIMUM requirements for the job. Everyone knows this..


    Wow ! So you are saying that no one qualifies for EB2 after 2004 !

    I kindly disagree.





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  • Filed Under: Andre Balazs



  • Refugee_New
    01-06 04:41 PM
    WOW!!!

    Can you read how much hate you are spewing in your posts? against jews, against hindus...against anyone who disagrees with the mostly wrong opinion you have. Where do you get your information from by the way? I mean the REAL TRUTH?? Have you been to Gaza?

    Read Hamas's charter....it is clearly mentioned in there "calls for the destruction of the State of Israel and its replacement with a Palestinian Islamic state in the area that is now Israel, the West Bank, and the Gaza Strip"

    At the same time read about "Greater Middle East", "Greater Isreal" and "New world Order" , "Unipolar world" etc if you have time.





    chelsea handler and andre balazs. Chelsea Handler amp; Andre
  • Chelsea Handler amp; Andre



  • nogc_noproblem
    08-26 07:19 PM
    Two rednecks were looking at a Sears catalog and admiring the models.

    One says to the other, 'Have you seen the beautiful girls in this catalog?'

    The second one replies, 'Yes, they are very beautiful. And look at the price!'

    The first one says, with wide eyes, 'Wow, they aren't very expensive. At this price, I'm buying one.'

    The second one smiles and pats him on the back. 'Good idea! Order one and if she's as beautiful as she is in the catalog, I will get one too.'

    Three weeks later, the youngest redneck asks his friend, 'Did you ever receive the girl you ordered from the Sears catalog?'

    The second redneck replies, 'No, but it shouldn't be long now. I got her clothes yesterday!'





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  • andre balazs and chelsea



  • VivekAhuja
    09-29 01:50 PM
    All democratic party candidates and supporters MUST BE rejected and voted out from all elections - Prez, state and local elections. These people are socialist uneducated fools. All they want to do it take your money and distribute it to the illegal aliens as WIC coupons, food coupons, free health, free schools, free tution and the list goes on. Let's elect the republicans!!
    I give a damn who the candidates are - remember, a president only signs a bill into law or vetos it, he has no other power.



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  • Legal
    08-08 02:22 PM
    1.Losing all your friends

    Man comes home, finds his wife with his friend in bed.
    He shoots his friend and kills him.
    Wife says "If you behave like this, you will lose ALL your friends."

    2. Brother wanted

    A small boy wrote to Santa Claus,"send me a brother"....
    Santa wrote back, "SEND ME YOUR MOTHER"....

    3. Meaning of WIFE

    Husband asks, "Do you know the meaning of WIFE? It means 'Without Information Fighting Everytime'!"
    Wife replies, "No, it means 'With Idiot For Ever'!!!"

    4. Importance of a period

    Teacher: "Do you know the importance of a period?"
    Kid: "Yeah, once my sister said she has missed one, my mom fainted, dad got a heart attack & our driver ran away."





    chelsea handler and andre balazs. Chelsea Handler - Standard
  • Chelsea Handler - Standard



  • Macaca
    05-30 05:36 PM
    Visa Case Lawyer Reveals Infosys Tactics (http://blogs.wsj.com/indiarealtime/2011/05/30/visa-case-lawyer-reveals-infosys-tactics/) By Amol Sharma and Megha Bahree | IndiaRealTime

    The lawyer for the U.S. employee of Infosys Technologies Ltd. who is alleging in a civil suit that his employer engaged in visa fraud and then tried to cover it up shared some details about the Indian outsourcing firm�s response to the suit so far.

    The lawsuit was filed in February in Circuit Court in Alabama and has sparked a high-stakes criminal probe of Infosys by U.S. federal investigators.

    Infosys doesn�t want a jury trial in the civil case and is pressing for arbitration, a mechanism in the U.S. system whereby a neutral third party resolves a dispute, according to Kenny Mendelsohn, a lawyer for Mr. Palmer. A federal judge will decide that matter.

    Mr. Mendelsohn, who emailed India Real Time a status update on the case, suggested that Mr. Palmer�s work laptop�which he says contains documents that would substantiate the claim of visa violations�has become a crucial piece of evidence in the case.

    He says Infosys tried to get the laptop back after Mr. Palmer started cooperating several months ago with U.S. authorities, who took interest in the case.

    �When Infosys learned that Mr. Palmer was cooperating with the Investigators, it demanded that he turn the laptop over to Infosys and threatened to fire him if he did not,� Mr. Mendelsohn wrote in the email. �However, Mr. Palmer on my advice opted to secure the laptop and the Investigators now have it.�

    Infosys said it was only following the law in seeking access to the computer after Mr. Mendelsohn filed his suit.

    �The notion that in this instance we have attempted to do anything inappropriate with respect to a company issued computer maintained by an employee is simply not accurate. In any context in which the company is involved in litigation or is otherwise required to preserve documents and electronic records, the law requires us to both secure and maintain copies of those records,� said the firm in an emailed statement. �That is precisely the practice that any company would follow in this situation and it is precisely what we have attempted to do here.�

    Infosys did not comment on the question of seeking arbitration or on Mr. Palmer�s present work status with the company.

    Mr. Palmer still works at Infosys but is �on the bench,� which means he is drawing a salary but isn�t staffed on any projects and is sitting at home, according to his lawyer.

    �He is not doing any work, but has continually contacted Infosys requesting another assignment,� Mr. Mendelsohn wrote. �Even though Mr. Palmer has received information that there are numerous positions available that could use him, Infosys still has not sent him to another assignment.�



    Fixing Congress (http://bostonreview.net/BR36.3/ndf_jim_cooper_fixing_congress.php) By Jim Cooper | Boston Review
    Coaching and Much More for Chinese Students Looking to U.S. (http://www.nytimes.com/2011/05/30/business/global/30college.html) By DAN LEVIN | The New York Times
    Is multiculturalism in Europe dead? (http://www.todayszaman.com/columnist-245422-is-multiculturalism-in-europe-dead.html) By Amanda Paul | Sunday's Zaman
    A Crackdown on Employing Illegal Workers (http://www.nytimes.com/2011/05/30/us/politics/30raid.html) By JULIA PRESTON | The New York Times
    Trust but E-Verify (http://www.nytimes.com/2011/05/30/opinion/30douthat.html) By ROSS DOUTHAT | The New York Times
    Justices� Arizona Ruling on Illegal Immigration May Embolden States (http://www.nytimes.com/2011/05/28/us/politics/28immigration.html) By JULIA PRESTON | The New York Times
    How the Other Half Lives, Still (http://www.nytimes.com/2011/05/27/opinion/27fri3.html) The New York Times Editorial
    High court lets Arizona usurp federal role on immigration (http://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/high-court-lets-arizona-usurp-federal-role-on-immigration/2011/05/26/AGqXlyCH_story.html) The Washington Post Editorial
    Immigrant-Law Ruling Irks Some Businesses (http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424052702303654804576349834244083052.html) By MIRIAM JORDAN And DANNY YADRON | Wall Street Journal



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  • chanduv23
    05-17 06:31 AM
    For folks who think banning any sort of consulting on hn1b will solve the purpose and has a good cause, this is what is going to happen.

    You most probably will have been a h1b working ina fulltime job. You will think that when h1b consultants go away, you will fall ahead in the queue and get ur GC. But my dear friend, the intent of this bill is different. IEEE USA, PG etc.. have members who are American citizens and a lot of them may be your own collegues at work and will be encouraging you to support their cause saying it benefits you.
    Once consulting is banned, and when your own American collegues know it is banned and consulting company cannot hire h1b, they will be after your job. They will make conditions miswerable for u at workplace and life will get worse and you will not have any options left for you but to lead a screwed up life.
    If you get fired or layed off, you will be left with no option at all. Remember, while cost cutting, companies will get rid of h1bs before they get rid of citizens, no matter how much u hang on to your job and how much u perform. Basic fact is that your are despensible.
    Their only aim in life is to get rid of all Asians especially Indians and Chinese and reduce their numbers drastically, they will follow any tool or weapon. Don't believe their sweet words and their intent to help you. You must help yourself and help IV.

    Though I do agree that h1b body shops indulge in irregular practices, this is common to any company. Look at biggies like msft, google etcc. they have an entire legal team working hard to workaround any system and utilize loopholes in the system. Thats how businesses survive and make money. Business means "no ethics". So just do not rationalize yourselves by claiming that you know everything. It all boils down to survival of the fittest and it is how you handle situations. Lets all not be selfish and be divided among ourselves.





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  • Chelsea Handler Denies Making



  • Macaca
    12-30 07:11 PM
    Judgment that risks tainting democracy (http://www.thehindu.com/opinion/op-ed/article1018825.ece) By VINAY SITAPATI | The Hindu

    One thousand three hundred and twenty days after he was first arrested, Binayak Sen has been sentenced to life imprisonment for sedition against the Indian state. Narratives on his guilt portray him as an �intellectual� coordinating Naxal attacks in the red corridor, just as narratives on his innocence are of a sainted doctor fingered by a vengeful state. But the only narrative that really matters is the legal case against him, and this in turn hinges on three distinct legal questions: Is the evidence against Dr. Sen enough to convict him? Are the laws applied to him fair? And finally, is the maximalist sentence (life imprisonment) justified?

    Around a single event

    The evidence against Dr. Sen centres on a single event. He is accused of having met a jailed Naxalite, Narayan Sanyal, 33 times and carried letters from him to a Naxalite, Piyush Guha. But Dr. Sen met Sanyal in Raipur Central Jail with the permission of the Chhattisgarh police; the jail superintendent who supervised the meetings told the Raipur sessions court that no letters were exchanged. At the other end of the �crime�, Piyush Guha did not name him when he appeared before a magistrate. He is alleged to have implicated Dr. Sen while in police custody. But this is legally barred from being weighed as evidence, since all custodial confessions are presumed tainted with torture.

    The central allegation against him is therefore tenuous at both ends. Other attempts to link him to Naxalites are individually trivial (or downright dubious, like an unsigned letter from the CPI-Maoists allegedly found in his house, but which is not part of the official seizure memo). But taken together they have managed to convince Justice B.P. Verma of Dr. Sen's role in aiding and abetting Naxal groups.

    The second concern is the fairness of the laws used against Dr. Sen. Section 124A of the Indian Penal Code (Sedition) is a colonial-era law that has been previously invoked against Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi. Since it is a serious offence with the possibility of life in jail, in the 1962 case of Kedar Nath Singh v. State of Bihar the Supreme Court limited the definition of sedition to the �tendency to create disorder or disturbance of public peace by resort to violence.� Dr. Sen is convicted for acting as a letter courier between Naxalites; it is questionable if this �act� falls within the definition of sedition.

    The other laws that Dr. Sen has been convicted under, the Chhattisgarh Special Public Security Act and the Unlawful Activities (Prevention) Act, make illegal a wide variety of actions that �support� unlawful activities: taking part in meetings or harbouring a Naxalite. These laws have been invoked against grain merchants and cloth traders who unwittingly sold their wares to Naxalites. Taken together, what all these laws do is to broaden the scope of what �guilt by association� means. Perhaps this is understandable in a State where Maoists are present in half of its 18 districts and requires an army of civilian supporters to sustain a war under forested cover. But fashioning a blunt legal tool to go after an elusive enemy enhances the risk of snaring innocents.

    The final concern

    The Congress party has declined to comment on the judgment, invoking the prerogative of an independent judiciary. It is no one's argument that the decision was politically determined. But political abuse includes the fairness of the laws formulated by the political class for judges to impose. After all, judicial independence must also consider the quality of laws that the Raipur sessions court had to enforce, and those laws define �guilt by association� so broadly that they blur the line between innocent and guilty.

    The final concern is that of punishment. Dr. Binayak Sen has been sentenced to life imprisonment for conspiring to commit sedition. Sentencing ranges from three years to life in jail. Justifying the use of the maximalist sentence, Justice Verma's Hindi judgment points to �the way that terrorists and Maoists are killing ... paramilitary forces � and innocent Adivasis.� But surely there is a difference between CPI (Maoist) General Secretary Ganapati, a man with much blood on his hands, and a mere courier of letters between Naxalites? Even if Dr. Sen is guilty as charged, that charge is not of violence � something he has repeatedly spoken out against. To club varying actions together defeats the purpose of flexibility in sentencing, which is after all to permit the judge to recognise degrees of motivations and culpabilities.

    The Raipur sessions court verdict is only the quarterfinal. Indian law affords Dr. Sen one automatic right to appeal, and another at the discretion of the Supreme Court. Meanwhile, given the visible disparity between the quality of allegations against him and the repercussions, the judgment is sure to provoke an outcry, if the national and international outrage over his two-year long arrest without bail is any indication (already Amnesty International has criticised the verdict).

    The outcry will reverberate beyond one man. In 2009, a non-violent critic of the state was held guilty of sedition and sentenced to a lengthy spell in prison. That man's name is Liu Xiaobo, and the international focus on him dims the mandarin equivalent of India Shining. While the specific �crimes� of the 2010 Nobel Prize winner vary from those of Dr. Binayak Sen, the life imprisonment given to the Chhattisgarh doctor will surely discredit the justifiable struggle against Naxalism much as Mr. Liu's incarceration discounts the distance China has travelled since Tiananmen Square. Apart from the irreparable harm to the life of an individual and his family, the judgment risks tainting Indian democracy itself.

    The writer is a doctoral student working on law and politics in India



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  • RNGC
    06-23 04:37 PM
    If you are worried about 485 getting denied then -

    1. Buy a house now and live in it for 10-15 years and build up equity.
    2. Put the house for sale a month or two or six months (depending on the real estate market in your area) before your PD becomes current (2025).
    3. Live in a rented house for one or two or six months in 2025. Better than living in a rented house from 2009 - 2025. Correct?
    4. But bigger house after GC gets approved OR go back home.

    2025: Congratulations!!! You just made 30-40% profit on your home. Go back home and retire.

    good!





    hair andre balazs and chelsea chelsea handler and andre balazs. Image comment: Chelsea Handler
  • Image comment: Chelsea Handler



  • thakurrajiv
    03-26 05:01 PM
    So what do you advise, is it right time to refinance or wait it out and why?
    Unfortunately, there are no simple answers. Mortgage rates are tied to 10 year bond rate, so they generally are not affected much by short term fed rate. With credit crunch, bond market is in real bad shape.
    Fed is trying to supply short term funds to ease this crunch. I don't know how low Fed will go for this. What I am seeing is mortgage rates being stable or going down a little in near term bcoz of Fed easing. For long term, I believe rates will go up as bonds have to become attractive to get new investors.This may not be the best ( absolute bottom) but definitely very good time to refinance if it makes sense for your conditions.
    For first time buyers like me, there are a lot of parameters to be considered. In my opinion the parameters are tilted towards faster house price drop . Hence I am waiting at least for a year. I will not do anything till next spring.



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  • unitednations
    08-02 12:03 PM
    Actually, USCIS does nothing with the Consulate copy of G-325 if applicant has been in the USA for more than one year. You can find this fact in the I-485 Adjudicator's manual.

    Possibly.

    However; there are many things that uscis asks for that they are hinging on the grayest of gray areas to get at other things.

    Examples:

    You don't need to submit tax returns with 485. However, they ask in RFE sometimes. Why do they do that?

    USCIS asks for photos of office in h-1b rfe's. There is nothing in the law/regulations stating they are supposed to ask for it.

    There is many examples where uscis/dos ask for things that are not required in the law/regulations. However; a lot of these types of evidence they ask for is for "intent", looking for inconsistencies, trying to look at the resonability of information...

    Long back when I used to just read memos/laws; it looked pretty straightforward. However; uscis uses the grayest of gray areas to their benefit, not your's.

    Department of state for every visa except h and L assume by default that a person has intention of immigrating. The onus is on us to show that we are not going to do that. Unfortunately, uscis is turning the same way in adjudicating of benefits. They seem to think that everyone is playing with the system and they in turn are becoming very difficult.





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  • gapala
    12-24 08:54 AM
    Well said Sanju.

    These are those age old arguments that they lay down to justify evil acts. its rediculous



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  • 485Mbe4001
    09-26 03:50 PM
    For arguments sake :)
    if Barak wins the skies will part, unemployment will disappear, GCs will rain from the sky. Americans will hug Iran and peace will prevail....it is insane arguments like the one below that obamaphiles make, scares me about what will happen when he becomes the president. No legislative experience that is ok for him but not ok for Republican VP choice. Trashy ads from him are ok but no..no from the republicans. not a single major newspaper talks about his dealings with rezko or the 100k allocated to be spent on the garden. No major deatails on a single concrete proposal...reason being that public is not interested in the finer details. In the tank with major unions, look at the promises being made to them...anyways i dont get to vote i can look at all this dispassionately and watch it from far. He has a slick marketing campaing and the media loves him. Either ways my EB is so screwed i dont think either can help us out.
    as you say 'lets take it EZ'

    Here is my Point if we educated legal immigrant community support Barack or John ( though its a virtual support because we are not eligible to vote:))

    If Barack doesn't win this 08 election economy is going to go further down , unemployment rates will spike , DOW will further nose dive , more banks will be bankrupt ( today morning WAMU broke 9/26/08) and there will be NO EMPLOYMENT BASED REFORM in such a Turbulent Job Market Situation.

    Anti Immigrant Groups will scorch the phone lines and will probably gather support from neutral peoples as well and scuttle any EB REFORM if the economy is bad. Their point is Americans are Jobless and you are giving Permanent Job Permit to Foreigners and any one will buy it - how much we SCREAM and SHOUT that we already have a Job, you know !

    Now tell me if you want to support Barack Obama OR John McCain - take it EZ





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  • Chelsea Handler enjoys a night



  • ArkBird
    05-01 01:42 PM
    By the way what is the actual status of this bill?



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  • xyzgc
    12-22 01:33 PM
    SOLIDARITY DEMONSTRATION
    Sunday, December 21, 2008 1.00 - 3.00 P. M.
    Dag Hammarskjold Plaza (East 47th Street between 1st Ave. and 2nd Ave.) Manhattan, New York

    • HAVE THE TERRORIST ATTACKS IN MUMBAI SHAKEN YOU TO THE CORE?
    • ARE YOU SICK TO YOUR STOMACH WITH THE PUSSYFOOTING OF COWARDLY LEADERS?
    • DO YOU WANT TO PROCLAIM TO THE WORLD PAKISTAN’S INVOVLEMENT IN THESE ATTACKS?
    • DOES YOUR HEART GRIEVE FOR THE TORTURED JEWISH PEOPLE OF CHABAD LUBAVITCH?
    • DO YOU SHED TEARS FOR 200 PEOPLE MASSACRED IN COLD BLOOD AND 400 INJURED?
    • DOES THE LOSS OF SOME OF THE BRAVEST AND FINEST OF THE POLICE & NSG BOTHER YOU?
    • HAVE YOU HAD ENOUGH WITH ONE AFTER ANOTHER TERRORIST ATTACKS?
    • DO YOU WANT TO HIGHLIGHT THE CRIMES AGAINST HUMANITY?
    • IS “ENOUGH IS ENOUGH” FOR YOU? DO YOU WANT TO DO SOMETHING?

    If you answered YES to any one of the above, then
    Come Rain, Snow or Cold, JOIN
    TRI-STATE INDIANS on SUNDAY, DECEMBER 21 at 1:00 P. M.
    The latest Pakistan sponsored terrorist attacks have traumatized the nation and left deep scars on its psyche. Property worth millions of dollars is destroyed and the economy is affected adversely. Safety of the people and security of the nation is compromised

    Who will set the things right? WE THE CONCERNED PEOPLE...


    TRISTATE INDIANS: Supporting Organizations
    Aligarh Muslim University Engineering Alumni Association of North America
    Afghan Hindu Association, Inc
    Arsha Bodha Center
    Art of Living Foundation, USA
    Baba Balak Nath Temple, New York
    Bangladeshi Hindus of America, New York
    Bangladesh Minority Forum, USA
    Bunt Association of North America
    Ekal Vidyalaya Foundation of USA
    Federation of Indian Associations
    Friends of India Society, International
    Hindi Samiti of USA
    Hindu Center, New York
    Hindu Collective Initiative of North America (HCINA)
    Hindu Human Rights Watch
    Hindu International Council Against Defamation (HICAD)
    Hindu Right Action Force (HINDRAF)
    Hindu Swayamsevak Sangh
    Indian American Intellectual Forum
    Kanchi Kamkoti Foundation USA
    Kannada Koota
    Malyali Hindu Mandalam of North America
    Marathi Vishwa
    Nataraja Mandir (WSFC)
    Om Temple of Garden State
    Overseas Friends of BJP
    Overseas Sindhu Sabha, New York
    Panchvati Ashram, New York
    Phagwah Parade & Festival Committee
    Punjabi Darbar Religious & Cultural Society
    Sadhanalaya Dance, Inc.
    Samskrita Bharati
    Satya Narayan Mandir, Elmhurst
    Save Temples in India
    Shree Trimurthi Bhavan
    Sindhi Circle, New York
    The Caribbean Voice
    The South Asian Times
    Vishwa Hindu Parishad of America
    and many more …

    As Indians, we owe it to ourselves to create a sense of awareness within ourselves and in the global community. A strong world opinion will eventually clamp down terrorism.

    911 exposed the face of terrorism to the entire world. It has also exposed many of the incorrect foreign policies of the american administration.

    Pakistani terrorism was a local problem till then largely ignored by the internationals.
    Now, terrorism is a global problem.

    Let's write against it, speak against it, whenever and wherever we get a chance instead of trying hard not to offend the feelings of others.
    Innocent lives are at stake here. Your economy is under attack. Attempts are being made to destabilize your country by inciting riots between religious groups.

    Wake up and don't worry about who's getting offended and who's not! Even those who are offended or pretend to be offended cannot escape the grim realities and will eventually support the anti-terrorism stand because terrorism is a threat even to its country of origin!





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  • sanju
    12-17 05:37 PM
    And BTW, if Bush can doctor intelligence reports in the digital age of 2003, and use those reports to go to WAR, how difficult would it be for a King to change religious books 1000 years back? Just think.

    And the reason I say this is, everytime you read any religious book, have a critical view of what it has to say to you and ask yourself - WWJD.



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  • rsdang
    08-11 05:19 PM
    If you don't laugh at the end of reading this then there's something wrong with you... Just imagine sitting in traffic on your way to work
    and hearing this. Many Chicago folks DID hear this on the WBAM FM morning show in Chicago. The DJs play a game where they award winners great
    prizes. The game is called "Mate Match." The DJs call someone at work and ask if they are married or seriously involved with someone. If the
    contestant answers "yes," he or she is then asked 3 random yet highly personal questions. The person is also asked to divulge the name of
    their partner (with phone number) for verification. If their partner answers those same three questions correctly, they both win the prize. One
    particular game, however, several months ago made the Windy City drop to its knees with laughter and is possibly the funniest thing I've heard
    yet. Anyway, here's how it all went down:


    DJ: Hey! This is Edgar on WBAM. Have you ever heard of Mate Match?

    Contestant: (laughing) Yes, I have.

    DJ: Great! Then you know we're giving away a trip to Orlando, Florida if you win. What is your name? First only please.

    Contestant: Brian.

    DJ: Brian, are you married or what?

    Brian: Yes.

    DJ: Yes? Does that mean you're married or you're what?

    Brian: (laughing nervously) Yes, I am married.

    DJ: Thank you. Now, what is your wife's name? First only please.

    Brian: Sarah.

    DJ: Is Sarah at work, Brian?

    Brian: She is gonna kill me.



    DJ: Stay with me here, Brian! Is she at work?


    Brian: (laughing) Yes, she's at work.

    DJ: Okay, first question - when was the last time you had sex?

    Brian: She is gonna kill me.

    DJ: Brian! Stay with me here!


    Brian: About 8 o'clock this morning.

    DJ: Atta boy, Brian.

    Brian: (laughing sheepishly) Well...

    DJ: Question #2 - How long did it last?

    Brian: About 10 minutes.

    DJ: Wow! You really want that trip, huh? No one would ever have said that if a trip wasn't at stake.

    Brian: Yeah, that trip sure would be nice.

    DJ: Okay. Final question. Where did you have sex at 8 o'clock this morning?

    Brian: (laughing hard) I, ummm, I, well...

    DJ: This sounds good, Brian. Where was it at?

    Brian: Not that it was all that great, but her mom is staying with us for a couple of weeks...

    DJ: Uh huh...

    Brian: .and the Mother-In-Law was in the shower at the time.

    DJ: Atta boy, Brian.

    Brian: On the kitchen table.

    DJ: Not that great?? That is more adventure than the previous hundred times I've done it. Okay folks, I will put Brian on hold, get this wife's
    work number and call her up. You listen to this.


    (3 minutes of commercials follow)


    DJ: Okay audience, let's call Sarah, shall we?


    (touch tones... ringing...)


    Clerk: Kinkos.

    DJ: Hey, is Sarah around there somewhere?

    Clerk: This is she.

    DJ: Sarah, this is Edgar with WBAM. We are live on the air right now and I've been talking with Brian for a couple of hours now.

    Sarah: (laughing) A couple of hours?

    DJ: Well, a while now. He is on the line with us. Brian knows not to give any answers away! or you'll lose. Sooooooo... do you know the rules of
    MateMatch?

    Sarah: No.

    DJ: Good!

    Brian: (laughing)

    Sarah: (laughing) Brian, what the hell are you up to?

    Brian: (laughing) Just answer his questions honestly, okay? Be completely honest.

    DJ: Yeah yeah yeah. Sure.. Now, I will ask you 3 questions, Sarah. ! If your answers match Brian's answers, then the both of you will be of To
    Orlando, Florida for 5 ! days on us. Disney World. Sea World. Tickets to the Magic's game. The whole deal. Get it Sarah?

    Sarah: (laughing) Yes.

    DJ: Alright. When did you last have sex, Sarah?

    Sarah: Oh God, Brian....uh, this morning before Brian went to work.

    DJ: What time?

    Sarah: Around 8 this morning.


    DJ: Very good. Next question. How long did it last?

    Sarah: 12, 15 minutes maybe.

    DJ:! Hmmmm. That's close enough. I am sure she is trying to protect his manhood. We've got one last question, Sarah. You are one question away
    from a trip to Florida. Are you ready?

    Sarah: (laughing) Yes.

    DJ: Where did you have it?

    Sarah: OH MY GOD, BRIAN!! You didn't tell them that, did you?

    Brian: Just tell him, honey.

    DJ: What is bothering you so much, Sarah?

    Sarah: Well, it's just that my mom is! vacationing with us and...

    DJ: Come on Sarah... where did you have it?

    Sarah: In the butt...

    (long pause)

    DJ: Folks, we need to take a station break





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  • sunny1000
    03-27 05:39 PM
    ok..My docs have been received by AO.

    Here is the email I got back today




    I hope everything goes smooth...still waiting :o

    good luck with your processing.;)





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  • Ramba
    08-05 03:35 PM
    Wow ! So you are saying that no one qualifies for EB2 after 2004 !

    I kindly disagree.


    I am not saying no one qualified. Most of the Eb3 jobs requirements were modified to EB2 to cut-short the EB3 line. Then, why every employer (particularly in IT) files EB2 LC, than EB3 after 2005? Why does DOL is autiting EB2 requirements for IT/Engineering jobs now?. Before 2004, even if employers requires MS+4 years or BS+8 years DOL approves the LC. Why they don't do now? It is just everyone wants to go for EB2, if they have that qualification.





    NKR
    03-25 02:13 PM
    If you have found a nice house in a good locality and have got a good deal, and if you think that not having GC is the ONLY hurdle, then I suggest you to go ahead and buy the house.

    I am on H1, I could not afford an independent house because of layers I have at work, so about 2 years ago, I went ahead and bought a town-home. I have a small kid now and we are happy. We might go for a bigger house after GC but I have not thought that far ahead.





    conchshell
    08-05 06:10 PM
    In a poor zoo of India, a lion was frustrated as he was offered not more than 1 kg meat a day. The lion thought its prayers were answered when one US Zoo Manager visited the zoo and requested the zoo management to shift the lion to the US Zoo.

    The lion was so happy and started thinking of a central A/c environment, a goat or two every day and a US Green Card also.

    On its first day after arrival, the lion was offered a big bag, sealed very nicely for breakfast. The lion opened it quickly but was shocked to see that it contained few bananas. Then the lion thought that may be they cared too much for him as they were worried about his stomach as he had recently shifted from India.

    The next day the same thing happened. On the third day again the same food bag of bananas was delivered.

    The lion was so furious, it stopped the delivery boy and blasted at him, 'Don't you know I am the lion... king of the Jungle..., what's wrong with your management?, what nonsense is this? Why are you delivering bananas to me?'

    The delivery boy politely said, 'Sir, I know you are the king of the jungle but ..did you know that you have been brought here on a monkey's visa!!!

    Moral: Better to be a Lion in India than a Monkey elsewhere!!!

    Now worst thing is that Lion can not change his job profile till he gets the green card. He will be forced to act like a monkey so that it matches with his monkey job profile mentioned in his PERM application. All he can hope for is to invoke AC21 after couple of years to join a new zoo, that too on a similar job profile. :D:D Gurus what are the Lion's options at this point of time?? :D:D:

    Irony is that if our Lion stays in USA on monkey visa for couple of years, and finally goes back to India, his Lion skills will be obsolete, and Indian zoo's will not entertain a Lion acting like a monkey. Our poor Lion is totally doomed. :D:D



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